Alex: Its Nana’s birthday this weekend; Adam, what’d you get her?
Adam: For my Nana’s birthday this upcoming Saturday, my family and I have chosen to hold a big celebration at my house. To be honest none of you are actually invited, but Mr. Cook and I would like to inform you about the yard games that will be played, quite intensely I might add, this Saturday.
Alex: You see, we’ve deemed yard games the true ultimate test of sport. It’s a true test of your manhood, or ladyhood. Bocce ball, croquet, the always dangerous lawn darts or my personal favorite, washers,are a true test of athleticism.
Adam: To us, if you’re good at basketball, football and baseball, then good for you. You’ve probably practiced them for almost your entire life. With yard games, you play them only on occasion, thus showing your true athleticism. I dare you to go out and try dominate washers or bocce ball, like some of you can dominate the hard-court.
Alex: You don’t need skill for football or basketball. There. I said it. At least not at the amateur level. All you have to do is jump high and run fast. Grandma doesn’t care if you can dunk on 8’6”. If you wanna show your family some true skill, why don’t you get through the wicket in one stroke, send your aunt’s ball back to 86’ where it belongs and set yourself up a nice final shot for the win. That was a croquet scenario in case you’re wondering, and one that will impress your relatives and might even earn yourself some inheritance.
Adam: Like my partner said, yard games at my house are big time. If you can’t bring it, then consider yourself excommunicated. If you’re champion, expect nothing short of getting treated like king/queen. Yard games are a test of true talent and athleticism, a test of courage and might. You have to bring your “A” game if you want any shot at the title this Saturday.
Alex: That’s right ladies and gentleman, it’s the true test of sport. So, I’m not sure what you’re doing this weekend, but I know I’ll be at the Daugherty household hustling Nana out of that birthday money. I’ve just got one question for you Adam… Should I bring chocolate chip cookies or lemon squares?
Adam: Chocolate chip, you know I’m obsessed.
